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Next Issue Posted 11/23/08

MEADOWLARK Archives

Previously in Meadowlark: When Becky’s blandishments do not produce the required effect she decides to give up. Though she want a marriage in every sense of the word she is willing to settle for what she has.

Issue # 27

Though Becky no longer purposely tried to entice Garrick, he couldn’t rid himself of the rampant desire she had kindled within him. The embarrassing episode with Collette had shown him no other woman would do. Only by taking long, strenuous hikes on his skis and keeping an iron hold on his emotions was he able to control it. His lust was always there, simmering just below the surface of his cool demeanor.

In the mountains there was little difference between January and February and the two months passed with the slow monotony of winter. Even so, life was far from boring. Becky and Garrick both loved watching Alaina’s development. They were thrilled the first time she laughed and ecstatic when she discovered her feet/ was a constant source of joy. There was no restraint where she was concerned, and both parents lavished all their affection on her. The baby was one thing they could share, and it wasn’t unusual for Becky and Garrick to spend the whole evening playing with her.

Alaina was a happy baby and usually cried very little. So when she was fussy one night in early March, they were worried. While Becky fixed supper Garrick held Alaina, rocked her, and even sang to her. Nothing helped.

Dr. Caldwell had gone to Miner’s Delight and wasn’t expected back until the next day, but Garrick was ready to hitch up the sleigh and go after him, when Alaina quieted. Even so, every time Becky tried to put her down she cried. It seemed as though hours passed before Alaina went to sleep in her mother’s arms. Relieved, but still anxious, Becky took Alaina to bed with her to be safe.

Several hours later, Becky woke up soaking wet. With a sigh, she climbed out of bed and lit a candle.

“What’s wrong?” Garrick asked sitting up sleepily.

“Alaina just wet all over everything. What a mess.”

“Is she feeling better?”

“I think so. Oh, Garrick, she has a tooth!”

“Well no wonder she was so cranky.” Garrick put on his pants and crossed the room. Alaina lay at the end of the bed where it was dry, gurgling happily to herself as Becky changed the wet diaper. Sure enough, a single tooth stuck up from her bottom gum. “I forgot all about her getting teeth,” he said. “Babies almost always have trouble with that.”

Becky was aghast. “Are they all going to be that miserable?”

“I sure hope not.”

“Well, you’re all happy now aren’t you, precious?” As Becky picked her up, Alaina snuggled down into her mother’s shoulder and closed her eyes. “And now you’re ready to go to sleep.”

“She may be, but you aren’t going to be able to.”

Becky glanced down at her wet bed and made a face. “Oh well, I’ll just get your old pallet out and sleep on the floor.”
“No, you take my bed, and I’ll take the pallet.”

“If anybody sleeps on the floor, it’s going to be me.”

Recognizing the stubborn set of Becky’s jaw, Garrick sighed. She really didn’t leave him much choice. “My bed’s big enough for both of us.”

“Are you sure?”

“As long as you don’t snore too loudly.”

“I don’t snore!”

“Well, somebody who sleeps over here does.”

“Every night?”

“Pretty much.”

“I’m sure a gentleman should ignore such a thing.”

Garrick grinned. “Kind of hard to ignore.”

“Humph, well...” she paused, obviously trying to think of a suitable retort. Suddenly her face brightened and she gave her head a toss. “Jeg elsker de, Garrick!”

Garrick’s smile deepened. “Same to you.”

“I said it first. Do you want the inside or the outside?”

“Of what?”

“The bed. Do you want to sleep on the inside next to the wall or on the outside.”

“I don’t care.”

“All right then. I’ll take the outside in case Alaina wakes up again.”

Garrick nodded. Wishing there were some way to avoid what was sure to be an extremely unpleasant night, he removed his pants and crawled into bed.

Becky put Alaina in her cradle and blew out the light before joining him. Garrick had built the bed to accommodate his large frame, and it was actually quite roomy. Even so they were achingly aware of each other, as they lay shoulder-to-shoulder and stared at the dark ceiling.

“Do you have enough room?” Becky asked.

“Ja sure,” he lied. “How about you?”

“Just fine.”

“Well, good night,” Garrick said as he turned on his side and faced the wall.

Becky swallowed past the lump in her throat. “Sleep well.”

Silence fell as the darkness closed in around them. Becky felt the sting of tears, and turned away. For months she’d dreamed of sharing Garrick’s bed but never this way. She didn’t even dare reach out and touch the broad back that was so close.

Garrick lay staring at the wall, every nerve in his body attuned to the woman who lay next to him. It was impossible to pretend she wasn’t there. He could feel every inch of her though the actual physical contact was negligible. He didn’t realize he was gritting his teeth until his jaw began to ache.

If he hadn’t been so aware of her, he might have missed the small in-take of breath behind him. It sounded like a muffled sob. Garrick rolled over and looked at her. All he could see was her back. “Becky?”

Embarrassed to be caught crying, she tried to pretend she was asleep, but Garrick wasn’t fooled. Propping himself up on an elbow, he looked down at her with concern.

“Becky, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing.”

“Since when do you cry over nothing?”

“I’m not crying.”

“Then what do you call these,” he asked reaching over brushing a tear from her cheek with a gentle finger.

“My eyes are watering.”

“And I’m king of England.” He said sardonically. “You don’t have to be afraid of me, Becky. I won’t touch you.”

She rolled to her back and looked up at him. “And why is that, Garrick? What is it about me that you dislike so much you can’t even bring yourself to touch me? I’ve asked myself a hundred times, and I can’t figure it out.”

Her words were so unexpected Garrick could only stare at her in speechless astonishment. Becky waited expectantly for several long moments. “Oh, never mind,” she said at last, throwing back the blankets and starting to get out of bed.

The motion galvanized Garrick into action. Before Becky’s foot touched the floor, a long muscular arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her back.

“Whoa now. I think we better talk about this.”

Becky gave a humorless laugh. “Well that’s a switch.”

“Whatever gave you the idea I couldn’t bear to touch you?”

“I wonder. Maybe because we’ve been married almost a year, and we still haven’t consummated it. Or maybe because you went a prostitute rather than your own wife.”

With an odd twist in his gut Garrick realized she saw his restraint as rejection. “I thought....I mean I never realized you’d want....”

“Well, you thought wrong! It so happens I do want. Very much. I told Angel I was willing to settle for what we have, and I am. But it hurts too bad to be this close to you, Garrick. Just let me go.”

Garrick felt like an utter fool. In the face of her unhappiness his reasons seemed less important, his restraint a useless burden to them both.

“You’re wrong, Becky.” His voice was a sensual caress as the iron band around her middle tightened to pull her back down onto the bed and into his embrace. “I’ve never wanted to touch anybody as much as I want to touch you. I dream about softness of your skin, and the silkiness of your hair.”

Becky’s resistance melted like snowflakes on a hot griddle as Garrick lifted her hand to his mouth and kissed the tips of her fingers before pressing it against his chest. “And I want you to touch me, to feel how you make my heart pound, to know just how much I want you.”

“Then why have you avoided me?”

“Because I was afraid I wouldn’t stop.”

Becky traced the hard line of his jaw with her fingertips. “So who wants you to stop?” she whispered. The last of Garrick’s good intentions evaporated like so much smoke, his control disappearing in a hot blaze of desire as she brushed her fingers across his lips. “Nothing lasts forever, Garrick. I don’t want to look back on this part of my life with remorse for what we could have had.”

With a groan his mouth came down on hers, branding her with his passion. His hand rode the swell of her rib cage as he adjusted his body to hers. A small moan escaped her as she lifted her arms to circle his neck.

They kissed open-mouthed, hungrily, reveling in the feel and taste of each other. For the moment, it was enough as waves of longing rocked them both. It suddenly became too intense and they broke apart, their breathing labored as their hearts hammering in syncopated rhythm.

{NOTE TO READERS: As you have probably guessed this scene develops into the first love scene of the book. However, since this is a general audience website and my fourth grade students have been known to drop in on occasion, I have censored this part of the story. It still exists in the full book of course and you can read it there.}

When they settled back to earth once again, Garrick rolled to the side, pulling her with him as he went. He knew their time together was limited, but for the moment, at least, they’d found their own little piece of heaven.